hey mister postman

I just love getting real honest to goodness paper mail, especially artsy mail. I received a hand made invitation to a wedding in the mail this week. It wasn't a total surprise as the groom had asked for my mailing address specifically so they could send the invite, but I relish that moment when you open the post office box and there it is, a little envelope with your name on it!

comic from www.nataliedee.com

During my university days, I longed for mail. Sure, I got emails from friends & family near and far, but it just isn't the same. To know that someone thought of you long enough to write a letter, and take the time to put a stamp on it and mail it....well for me, that's the greatest. I still thrill over getting mail, but now that I am a bonafide adult I don't get those words of encouragement quite as often. I miss that.


In the hustle and bustle of our lives in this day and age, taking the time to write and mail a letter is almost unheard of. Some I am going to resolve right here, right now, to make a change. I am going to mail at least one letter to a friend or family member every month for the rest of the year. My goal is to bring a little bit of sunshine to some of my favourite people, and in doing so bring some more light into my own life. Because in my experience, there is no better feeling than knowing that you have brightened someone's day.

I often listen to CBC radio when I am in my car. And since I do a half hour commute to work and back every day that means at least an hour of car time. Anywho, the other night I was listening to Ideas (with host Paul Kennedy). Ideas "is a program about contemporary thought". They often air interesting documentaries and on this particular evening they were airing "It's a teen's world: wired for sex, lies and power trips" a documentary by Lynn Glazier. I wanted to listen to it again, but I can't seem to find the audio on the website. I think that maybe they will wait until after episode 3 airs and then put the whole thing up. I definitely recommend checking giving it a listen if/when it becomes available. Here is a description of episode two, from http://www.cbc.ca/ideas/features/teens-world/index.html:

"Teen girls may be the biggest losers when it comes to navigating a popular culture that is high-tech and hyper-sexualized. They are bombarded by media messages telling them they have to put themselves out there sexually in order to be popular and cool - a generation pushed to flaunt its sexuality without grasping the consequences. It has fostered a climate of sexual harassment and bullying among youth."

I don't think that anyone will be surprised to hear about the difficulties that young girls face navigating the waters of sexuality. Girls can often be harder on each other as far as labeling is concerned, and that is not news either. When I think back on my high school days I recall hearing a lot more girls using the 'slut' and 'whore' labels than boys. However, what did surprise me was just how much harassment and even sexual assault girls are facing as early as middle school.

Listening to these girls I get the feeling that they dress and act they way that they feel they have to in order to be popular or to fit in. But then the message that is coming across becomes "I'm available" when what they really are trying to say is "please be my friend". Most of them don't have the emotional maturity to deal with how these actions make them feel. What they need is positive attention directed at something other than their looks, and someone who cares about them to tell them that they are worth more than a casual grope.

Do I know what the answer is? No. Does anyone? I can't say. I just feel sad that girls feel the need to start sexualizing their images at such a young age. A twelve year old does not need to wear make-up and try to look 'sexy', let alone engage in actual sexual activity! They have very little understanding of the power of their sexuality. And don't even get me started on the boys. How on earth did we get to the point in our society that middle school boys believe that it is completely acceptable, even within their right, say that classmate is "do-able", or to touch a classmate without her permission? Or to tell a pre-teen girl that she is a tease because she won't perform oral sex on you? All I can say is that a major shift in thinking needs to happen, and it needs to happen NOW.